Access Forgotten!!! (Not denied)

Hi!!!

It has been a while. In fact, it has been a lonnnnnnnnng time!!! Great to be back, and great to have you read again (or for the first time).

So guess what happened this morning... I'll tell you. But as usual it was something that got me thinking...

I got to work today and remembered I had left my access card in my car boot as I drove into the premises. To get in with a car, you have to swipe your access card and the 'main gate' will open for you to drive in. Fortunately for me, the security personnel was at the entrance and he noticed a familiar face (me :) ) and he let me in as I explained my access was in my boot. Nice!

Then I found a parking spot, and walked into the basement, which is the closest entrance to the building from where I parked. When I got to the lift, I pushed the door and it refused to open!!

So here I was, at the entrance into the building itself, just a few minutes away from desk and I couldn't get to the elevator! My word, I was shocked. I was like, "Have I come too early? Maybe they unlock the doors after 8am."

I noticed another entrance to the building ahead of me leading to a stairwell and I proceeded to use that instead. I started to laugh, "Maybe they want us all healthy in the mornings. Walk and be healthier, O ye early birds!!" loooollllllzzzzzz... but as I approached this other entrance I remembered!!! "Arrrgghhhhh, my ACCESS [card]!!!"

Silly Fosie... mehn! I couldn't believe it. The amount of energy I had exerted on trying to pry the door to the elevator open. Thinking if I pushed hard enough, it would open up for me. Realising it had been locked, and then reasoning that I was too early, or the company just wanted us healthy. Boy, did I feel sheepish.

It didn't end there, I got into the little space that led to the elevator and I started pressing the elevator button... No response. Then I pressed it again, still no response. Then I noticed the little black box that immediately seemed to tell me, "Ofosua, darling, please swipe here." At this point I was in absolute stitches and in absolute wonder of how many of us do this ehhhhhhhveryday!!

¹⁴ Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven,^[f] Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. ¹⁵ For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. ¹⁶ Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

(Hebrews 4:14-16 - NIV)

How many times have we not used our access to the throne room of grace? How many times have we not simply stopped what we were doing and prayed in faith, believing God that He hears, listens and provides help in our time of need? How many times have we not used our free pass given us by the blood of the loving Saviour Who gave His life that we may live? How many times have we reasoned our way through our struggle without remembering that we need not remain there helpless and all alone? How many times have we fought ehhhhverything else but not asked God to resolve the conflict that makes us sweat needlessly? How many times? How many times each day? How many times have we forgotten that our access actually gives us, well, access...

I am wearing my access card as I type this and looking at it, I smile. I smile and tell myself that I will keep clothing myself in prayer and faith, and receive mercy and find grace in my times of need... I will keep my spiritual access on and use it...

And you? Of course I was not going to forget you like how I forgot my card this morning... lol.... What about you? What are you going to do?

He Laughs

My God
He laughs

He's not angry all day
Or just approving perfections his way
No sense of humour in His belly
O come on! He laughs. O surely!
My comedy, my laughter, my tease has a source
It's hard to tell me my source is not God
The source of all life
Of variety, of true delight

My God
He laughs

And when He does
Do the birds break out in song?
When He does
Does our weakness make us strong?
When He does
Does the sun shine more it rays?
Does the moon make our nights days?
Does the wind blow a melody?
Does the child begin to dream?
Do I suddenly burst into praise and thanks?
Do the prisoners begin to dance?
Do the waves perfect their percussions of the soul?
Does the dead seed begin to grow?
Do the wicked suddenly recognise the folly of their ways?
Do the downtrodden begin to experience the brighter day?
Do the cold suddenly warm up and see their God
Do the offended cry out, 'Praise the Lord!!!'
Do the thunders bellow and lightening flash?
Or does someone receive a lot of cash?

Surely I could go on and on
I could guess and may never be wrong

I know, I am convicted
My God
He laughs

But what happens when He does?

By Ofosua
Thursday, 6th October, 2016

Sincere Praises

Silent songs
In silent places
Broken hearts
And sincere praises
Tears that flow
In pain and sorrow
Hearts look up
For a new tomorrow
Trust in God
Is not as real
But when it's all you got
It's the real big deal
Shattered hopes
A conducive avenue
To open our eyes
And see miracles true
The devil attacks
None but my faith
So I know
He lies in wait
As
Silent songs
In silent places
Broken hearts
And sincere praises
Tears that flow
In pain and sorrow
Hearts look up
For a new tomorrow
I trust in Jesus
He's all I've got
Father and Holy Ghost
Blood shed for me
On Calvary
Greater than all
My calamity
My eyes on Jesus
My hope, my all
This season of doubt
A chance to lose all
Lose all to God
Whose promises are true
All to God
Who adores me and you
Silent songs
In silent places
Broken hearts
And sincere praises
Tears that flow
In pain and sorrow
Hearts look up
For a new tomorrow
I sing and dance
Though the World plays no song
I love with all my heart
Though I just feel wronged
I live the Christian life
Though I feel the fool
I open my eyes to God's wonders
I'm now right in the miracle avenue
Faith by hearing
Hearing the Word of God
Receiving by believing
I cling to hope in spite of all
Hope does not disappoint
For He has poured love into our hearts
Love to love all, excluding none
The nice and the bad
Silent songs
In silent places
Broken hearts
And sincere praises
Tears that flow
In pain and sorrow
Hearts look up
For a new tomorrow
My God is good
No matter what
My issues solved
Or not
Like the three hebrew men
To Nebuchadnezzar I say
We trust in God
Who can save us today
But even if he does not
We will not bow O King
O Devil you missed
Your target in my suffering
For
Silent songs
In silent places
Broken hearts
And sincere praises
Tears that flow
In pain and sorrow
Hearts look up
For a new tomorrow
Have made me see
The beauty of my God
Have made me trust more
And love Him even more
Within or without
The unfortunate undesired circumstances
My God is my love
The source of love in all instances
Silent songs
In silent places
Broken hearts
And sincere praises
Tears that flow
In pain and sorrow
Hearts look up
For a new tomorrow
Now I sing a brand new song
Praise to my God all day long
Like David I dance
Though the World not play for me
My Jesus, my lance
Miracles around me I see!!

Hallelujah!!!!


By Ofosua
On Sunday, 7th August, 2016

Rumours

I have learnt to take the rumours of others lightly
Because in the same way
People have misquoted me
Judged me
Misunderstood me
Envied me
Experienced me differently
Or just caught me on my bad side
What they told others
May have a hint or more of truth
But it doesn't mean it told
An accurate story of me

I have learnt to take the rumours of others lightly
Because I dare to give them a chance
An unblemished sheet of opinion
I dare myself to experience them on my own
Not once, not twice
Because we are only human
Who hurt others even when we don't mean so

I have learnt that rumours will exist
About everyone including me
Some blatant lies
Others heartfelt reliable witnesses
But none the ultimate truth
None the Bible of me

I have learnt
Because it takes a while to learn
And I keep learning
Because I'm human
You're human
We're all human
Loved by God
Who teaches us love by example
In that
While we were yet sinners
Christ died for us
In that
He gives us many chances
Not out of a need for concrete evidence
To cut us off
But out of our need for love

I have learnt
And keep learning everyday
To love
Above myself
Above all else
To love

Via Ofosua
Thursday, 26th May, 2016
ofosuasthotsntalk.blogspot.com



Good morning

Come into the light

Last Saturday, I did some late night work on my sewing machine. Problem was I didn't know how late it was till I was done and rather satisfied with my work. The time read about half past one. So I probably slept after 2am on Sunday. 

Five or so hours behind my sewing machine, in front of the mirror and on my bedroom floor were I drew out patterns. Five or so hours adjusting a handful of clothes that had grown big on me and needed to look like they were mine and not someone's.

Obviously, when the sun began to shine it's light on Sunday morning, I was just too exhausted to make it to church. I had had a long Saturday and didn't help myself with stitching for a significant part of the night.

Early that afternoon I returned to put my finishing touches on the previous night's sewing. Guess what?

I'm sure you guessed quite right. The last item I had enthusiastically worked on that had swallowed probably half my time the night before was in a mess. So I undid four long rows of seams, measured up again, drew one last pattern for the item, starting sewing and was done in about 2hrs. Phew!!

And as usual, it got me thinking...

How many times have I over enthusiastically rushed to do something because I felt like it but had little light to notice the major flaws I was making? How many times did the darkness delight me and the task at hand excite me that I didn't realise waiting for the light would save me the time I so needed? How many times have I wasted time and resources (oh so much thread!!! Lol) because I worked without the light of adequate direction? How many times have I refused to come into the light instead?

There've been many... and I'm sure there've been quite a number for you too.

When Jesus said He is the light of the World, I believe He meant light for any thinkable thing. He is our light when...
   when we need to readily find our way
   when we need to get out of darkness
   when we don't want to stumble
   when we need to avoid certain mistakes
   when we need to shine, however we need to shine
   when we need to bring light to another
   when ... when we need light...
He is our light!!! The light in us, the light for us, the light of the World!

So the next time it's night, remember our Light: our Jesus Christ #allsmiles

'Jesus, You are the light in me'

When Jesus spoke again to the people, He said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows Me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life."
(John 8:12 - NIV; caps on pronouns mine)

Happy

If My people
Who are called by My Name
Will humble themselves
And seek My face
I will hear from Heaven
And heal their land

God bless our homeland, Ghana
And make our nation great and strong

Happy Independence Day
Seek My face
Hear from heaven
Heal our land

Our homeland, Ghana
And make our nation

Heal
Happy
Hear
Our land

Happy Independence Day
Christians who depend on God
Ghanaians who seek His face
And see the healing of our land

Happy Independence Day
Christians who depend on human strength
Ghanaians who seek our way
And see the dealings of our land

Happy Independence Day
Jesus is King in spite of it all
Jesus is Lord but will we heed to His call?
Gallant Christians, Ghanaians to stand tall
Only before our God to fall
Humble ourselves
Seek His face
Heal our land
Happy...

Stop! Take Note! Praise!!

Stop!
Stop when my heart is heavy
Stop when I don't know what to do
Stop when my world's gone crazy
Stop and take note of what I should

Take note of the Lord's great mercy
Take note of all He's brought me through
Take note of all the beauty that surrounds me
And praise Him! Don't focus on what He didn't do

Praise Him for the Lord is good
Praise Him because He's done more than I wanted Him to
Praise Him! O my God! You are worthy!!!
Praise Him! This is what we're created to do

Stop! Take note! And praise!
He gave us today
Stop! Take note! And praise!
He washed our sins away
Stop! Take note! And praise!
He overcame hell and the grave
Stop! Take note! And praise!
He's working out all good things His way

I will not judge You, Lord
I am human
I may be tempted God
But You are kind
You remind me Lord
That You're still mighty
And You hold my hand
To make my thoughts divine

I will sing of Your grace
And Your mercy
I will remind myself
Of all the good You've done
I will not make my problems
Take supremacy
Because with You, Lord
I have more than won

And when life's good
I will think of Your goodness
And when life's bad
I will praise you for all I've had
In all my ways I just want to rightly focus
To stop, take note and praise
My loving Dad

Composed after reading odb.org/2016/02/27/taking-notice/ and it's related passage Job 40:1-14

Night's Other Side

On the other side of the night
Stood the same girl
But she didn't want to fight
She did not hate men
As she normally does
But had heard too many tales
Of abuse and being taken advantage of
A kind good man she could barely see
She had her own scars that still made her bleed
Now you stand on the other side and see the darkness
Not the story that's caused this sadness, this madness
Too mean to be queen you declare
At the other side

On the other side of the night
Stood the same boy
But he didn't want to fight
Hungry and poor and thrown out in the cold
He saw his mother struggle and die too young to be old
The hard side of power slapped him in the face
At 7 he learnt the wicked get ahead in the race
His sister tried her best but prostitution barely paid
It seemed clear heaven never cared he had a name
Now you stand on the other side and see the darkness
Not the story that's caused this sadness, this madness
Too cruel to be alive you declare
At the other side

On the other side of the night
Stood who? YOU!
But you didn't want to fight
Disapprovals of disdain
Efforts that only brought pain
Secret sins that thrived
The times others made you live their lies
Used and tossed out like dirt
And all that caused your hurt
Now they stand on the other side and see the darkness
Not the story that's caused this sadness, this madness
You have no excuse they  declare
At the other side

On the other side of the night
Stood our God
But He chose not to fight
Fight the night that was our sin
On that cross so that we could win
Alone and burdened, forsaken by all
Surely you must have heard His heavenly call:
My God! My God! Why have You forsaken Me!!*
All this and much more so we could be truly free
Now we can stand on the other side and see beyond our darkness, our madness
See the story that's makes us overcome all sadness
He the Son sets free is truly free** we boldly declare
On each and every side

Do not look and walk away
Please, please come to Christ today
Ask Him to wash you clean
With His blood and set you  free
From the power of sin and of death
Let Him be your Lord above all else
Let Him heal you of your sadness
The shame and evil that causes your madness
He stands victorious above all darkness
His life eternal He gives with gladness
Please do not walk away today
On this or any side

Jesus Christ said:
'The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life and have it to the full'
(John 10:10 - NIV)

Do you choose life?
The life bigger than all nights?

* Matthew 27:46
** John 8:36

Scared

I just had a nightmare
My eyes were open
My glasses by my side
No words heard or spoken
My partly braided kinky hair
Drying up beneath the fan's wind
As I took a short deserved break
From my detangling and twisting
I saw a bug crawl
Slowly and steadily
Getting closer to the wall
Nastily and stealthily
I panicked not knowing what to do
To the huge bug on the floor
I grabbed my glasses to confirm my fears
It shouldn't be some scorpion!!!
As my eyes tuned into focus
I definitely felt silly
No bugs or funny creatures
But a clumped mass of my hair pretty
Blown by the same wind drying my hair
Glad it was all in my mind and no bug was there
Illusions...

Primary School Prayer

When I taught Sunday School
We spoke of prayers Jesus answered
And when we did more often than not
The children would speak of this lot:
'Lord Jesus, please help me find my pen
I can't find it in my room'
'Lord, please help me find my pencil
I need to finish my homework'
And so these prayers went
And I remembered when I said them too
A young child in primary school
'Lord please help me find my eraser
It's still very new'
Never did we talk about answered prayers
And this kind wouldn't show up
This primary school prayer
Of what was lost
Lord, tonight
I say one too
Please help me find this
I've searched my room
It's dear to me Lord
I need it too
I remember when you answered
In primary school
How you answered
Those little children too
I kneel tonight Lord
And come to you
Knowing and believing
You will once again listen
And answer 'Yes, my child, I will help you'
You will answer as you have before
And you will restore
Once more
With undisputed assurance
With child like confidence
With faith
With all my heart
I repeat this prayer
As from primary school
'Dear Holy Spirit
Help me find this'
Thank you, Lord Jesus!
Your Name be praised
Again and again
Father God
Hallowed be Your Name
Hallelujah...

Via Ofosua
On Monday, 22nd February, 2016

The Woman and the Beard

In primary school
She discovered her moustache
Looked back at her pictures
And realised for long she had had
This moustache
Barely seen
But there
Short and almost unnoticeable
Tiny whiskers

A confidence had sprung in me
Ahead of the pack, natural leader of the team
Definitely not authority supreme
They were fearfully up there
I was approachably down here
Ensuring compliance
Pursuing excellence
But not in the realm of the Queen Bees

As she grew older
Her upper lip hairs became longer
Accepted even
And learnt shaving them would worsen
She left them as they were
Odd but rather unnoticeable but still there
She told herself, 'Leave them be
They're not meant to hurt me
Luckily I have no beard'

A natural leader I seemed to be
At least that's what some called me
Getting better at my work
Learning to overcome my demons that lurked
Noticed more women in dreadful high places
Glad I needn't aspire to their graces
Ugly life it mostly seemed
Lonely, hostile those Queen Bees

She asked an 'aunt' why she had a beard
Luckily this aunt was not related to her
The lesson on genetics made it quite clear
Inheritted by many but dormant in few
From which these ugly beards grew
Eeeeewwwwww
Those beards made her cringe
Those scattered curly things
At a woman's chin

Those Queen Bees I'm told
Are hags and old
Climbing up on high ladders
Stepping on faces of others
So they can reach the top
And be there alone
Those Queen Bees I was told

She looked in the mirror and saw a strand
'O God would you permit this?
I don't understand!'
Yes it was, not one but two
Two black curly strands
Sticking out too
She wish she could deny it
But they were there
She was beginning to grow
You guessed right
An ugly beard!!

So I worked hard
And forgot about promotions
After all those high positions
Could also mean demotions
In love and life and family and fun
Bosses were often left with nothing when they had won
And who really wants to be a Queen Bee
Despised and ridiculed
Judged and laid bare?

Some more years down the line
Before the mirror again
She found more strands
All over her chin like they were insane
A moustache untouched
But still easy to keep in order
A beard now all over
In single strands that made her shudder
She now had what made her sad
What in her eyes made women look bad
What made women look mean
Whether they were nice, harsh or unseen
Her standard of beauty now shattered
But harder than when she had discovered
Her moustache young and free
Unaffected by steorotypes and prejudices
She looked harder and saw more
Smaller and longer strands than before
She seemed to have come of age
But why now and why this way
How was she going to live with this beard?

Promotions were granted
And with that came fights
Battles to ensure
What was done was right
Proving that I was worthy of my name
Playing the politics right
Without falling out of the game
Cat calls and name tags
Started to reach my ears
Compromises that affected
My loved ones and all I hold dear
Life could be tough, sometimes lonely
Sometimes fun, sometimes won
Sometimes full of long hours
When others had gone
One day I looked mirror
And took a long hard look at me
Thought about my life
Oh no!!! I had become one of those Queen bees
Not sure how to move forward
With this discovery
I looked at my chin and stared
Oh my goodness!!! Is that a beard????!!

Phone Call

It's 17:07
The EXODUS
Time for me to LEAVE work
At that point I get a call
'Hello?'
'Hello, Ma. The carpenter is in, tools and all'
'Tell him to start work, I'll be home in an hour'
'I told him so, but he says you owe him some 'power''
'Power? What does he mean let me speak with him'
'Please hold'
'Madam?'
'Good evening, Boss. What's going on?'
'Madam, you said you go give me some'
'Please what some?'
'Some more power, more money. So I no fi' start'
'MASSAH you want to TEST my heart?
What money again? I paid for everything just like that
Now you want something more
Boss, MERIBAH, please give the phone to my son'
'Hello Ma?'
'This our carpenter
He wants to QUARREL nti MERIBAH
I won't be long, I'll be home in an hour
Ok?'
'Ok'
'See you soon'
'Bye'
What koraa is this?
TESTING and QUARRELS
When I am about to LEAVE
Call time 17:07
Good heavens!!!
Hmmm, these words weirdly remind me
Of Exodus verse seven
Of chapter seventeen

Exodus 17:7 

And he called the place Massah and Meribah because the Israelites quarrelled and because they tested the LORD saying, 'Is the LORD among us or not?'

(version: NIV-UK)

Via Ofosua
Saturday, 30th January, 2016

The pun, the fun, the Word we heard 

Baker's Spoon - Crafted Thoughts

A gift you declined
You said the thought was fine
You told me your delight
I had to give you something just right
I dreamt of the spoon
And the laughter it gave you and me
You'd be leaving soon
I had to make it a true  reality
I asked for a contact
Called and stated my facts
Got delighted as the hours drew near
They etched those words I still hold dear
Crafted thoughts it seemed
Crafted thoughts became to be
I'm glad you liked the gift my friend
Glad you said it'd be useful at your end
Surprised you hugged me not once but thrice
Glad I took this chance and rolled my dice
I will miss you and I fear memories of you will fade
But I hope as you use this spoon you'll remember good times when you came

Bon voyage, mon amie, my baker friend
May my crafted thoughts remain useful till the end

Honour your word

Yesterday, I made a promise. A promise that didn't cost much in Ghana cedis. I was to fulfill it today and I wanted to do so this morning. But here's the hitch, it would mean I would only have one ₵20 note to get to work. That wasn't good because public transport drivers may not get change for a fare that's less than a tenth of that early in the morning. Also drivers could be rude if you gave them such a huge amount at that time of the day. But I decided to keep my promise, I thought it showed good example and the one I had promised was looking forward to it.

So I used up all my small change to keep my promise and set out for work. As expected,  the driver I first met grumbled a lot. Unexpectedly, however, he asked me to get down after a distance! The second driver grumbled too, but when I reached my stop, he gave me my ₵20 note. I thanked him and gave him the only two coins I had instead. Those coins are worth a tenth of the current fare (which is really really small in view of the recent fuel price increase and the not yet adjusted transport fares). I told him, 'May God make these a blessing to you,' and alighted.

And then I waited for the bus. After a bit, a black car stopped where I was. Not unusual, it's a bus stop and lots of cars had stopped there already. I heard my name. Recognised my fellow bus boarder in the front seat. Got pleasantly surprised. Did a quick calculation of where this lift could take us to. Sat in the car and realised my other colleague I hadn't seen in a while because she had been on leave! A free ride to work! In fact, three free rides to work...

And it got me thinking and writing...

How many times have we been required to honour our words? How many times have we made promises that we intended to keep, but never did? How many times did procrastination become justified by our convenience? How many times have we let our family down? Our bosses and subordinates down? Our friends down? God down?

How many times have we shunned honouring our word in even the little things assuming God could be mocked? Assuming we did not reap what we sowed (Galatians 6:7-9)?
- I'll wash the dishes
- I'll buy electricity units on my way from work
- Kofi, drink your medicine and I'll give you cake
- I'll submit the report today
- I'll explain the Maths assignment to you
- I'll call you back

And how many times have we actually done so and experienced that God delights in Christians who walk their talk? Ɔseadeɛyɔfoɔ no*? The promisefulfillers? Those who witness the faithfulness of God by being faithful themselves?

Don't get me wrong. I'm not trying to boast. It is to my own shame that I am reminded of the many times I said I will do stuff for others and God but eventually refused to do them. We are truly saved by grace. But now that we are saved, we should produce fruit worthy of our calling. For faith without deeds is dead (James 2:21-26).

Interestingly enough, God rewards our faithfulness to Him and to others in more ways than one. My free rides to work reminded me of this.

He is The Faithful Who delights in His faithful. Need we doubt this and be, do otherwise?

And after reading this, which of the two groups of times would we rather increase to God's glory? Which one would we rather proclaim to the World in our deeds? Which one would boldly shout without words, 'Christ in me!!!'

Which one?
Yes, I am asking you as much as I ask myself today...

... which one?

.

Galatians 6:7-9 (NIVUK)
7 Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.  8 Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life.  9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

.
James 2:21-26 (NIVUK)
21 Was not our father Abraham considered righteous for what he did when he offered his son Isaac on the altar?  22 You see that his faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did.  23 And the scripture was fulfilled that says, ‘Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness,’ and he was called God’s friend.  24 You see that a person is considered righteous by what they do and not by faith alone.

25 In the same way, was not even Rahab the prostitute considered righteous for what she did when she gave lodging to the spies and sent them off in a different direction?  26 As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead.

.
*Ɔseadeɛyɔfoɔ no: from the twi word, Ɔseadeɛyɔ, meaning one who does what s/he says s/he will do, a dependable person who fulfills his/her promises. Often an appellation for God. Ɔseadeɛyɔfoɔ no would then mean the people that do what they say they would do.

The Wonder Years

At 7
I wanted to watch it
They said I was tired
So I had to go to bed
At 17
I wanted to watch it
And though I was tired
I could, so I did
At 27
I wanted to watch it
I was tired
But it was wise not to, I went to bed
And missed the show
Even though
I may not see it again
My entire body more important
Than the delight of my eyes

At 5
I wanted to eat it
But couldn't
She said she had no money
In her money-filled purse
At 15
I wanted to eat it
And bought it
I had saved my own money
I decided how I operated my own purse
At 25
I wanted to eat it
But I walked away
My salary could afford it
But my body could not
The weight gain was obvious
The life plans still pending
I needed to be wise on my spending
And that sweet treat
That juicy fat piece
Cost more than its price
Than its every bite

At 10
I wanted to miss school
But he woke me up at 5
I wanted to cry
I got ready begrudgingly
Got to school in time
At 20
I wanted to miss class
So I analysed its importance
Half asleep in my bed
I stayed in my room
To go for tutorials instead
At 30
I wanted to miss work
My body sore
From the day before
Early morning meeting I could not ignore
Deadlines to meet
The work mine to complete
I pulled myself out of bed
Prayed for the next public holiday
To arrive quickly instead
Make myself worth my salt
Perform my duties, keep my job
Be reliable as my conscience could be
Early hours late nights
So I can get my output right

Sigh, a lot changes in 10 and 20 years....
It's a wonder what happened to these wonder years*

*with loose reference to American Comedy TV series 'The Wonder Years'. You may read the plot at https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Wonder_Years

Incomparable

There's no feeling like
Being lost
And found
Being blind
Just to see
Being bound
And set free

There's nothing like
Losing hope
To have faith
Being discouraged
To discover grace
Being broken
And made whole again

Jesus
There's none sweeter
Than knowing You
None greater
Than Your love so true
No favour
Than Your mercy that found me

Found me
When I was lost, blind, bound
Out of hope, discouraged, broken
And still finds me, even today
Still finds me, when I lose my way
Finds me, so by You I can stay

Your hand caught me, broke my fall
Your light warmed me, through it all
Dear Jesus, You heard my call

Oh God! My God!

I worship You
You did it all
Bought me with Your blood
When I deserved of it none
Placed my feet on the right path
Even after I scorned Your grace again, O again
How I deserve such love
I cannot begin to comprehend
I love You, Jesus
I love You, Lord

My Love, my Worship, my Lord, my All...

In silence my heart continues to sing
Speechless, Your praises still ring
In continuing awe, I worship Thee

Hushed Hallelujahs shouted out loud into the deafening silence of this night

Selah...

Behind our phones

I hid behind the phone today
Boiled up in anger, spat in rage
Spoke words I couldn't speak in person
Taught that S.O.A.B. a sounding lesson
Did more than blows and slaps deliver
Fired shameful arrows out of my quiver
I hid behind my phone

I hid behind my phone today
Pretended it was fine to have fun and play
Covered the tears that were falling on my screen
Texted jokes and posted bountiful smilies
No one could see the pain churning inside
No one noticed why or even that I had to cry
I hid behind my phone

I hid behind my phone today
Told all the lies so I could get laid
Spoke sweet words of love and heartfelt honour
She couldn't even tell all I wanted was one shocker
Promised her heaven on earth all our days
Meehhnn she was now in my hands, I could have my own way
I hid behind my phone

I hid behind my phone today
Told the world I was in Paris on a french holiday
Shared pictures of my ticket bound to Cape Town next week
Told them I bought this gorgeous set of pearls and dresses sheek
Whilst I sat locked up in my room at Adenta SSNIT flats
I portrayed the life of the Kardashians like I'd been there, done that
I hid behind my phone

I hid behind my phone today
Praying for someone for God to make a way
Preaching and teaching the Word on Facebook
Rebuking the lost who disgraced the Brotherhood
Flipping between that and sakawa sites
Making myself rich not calling it Stealing but Shop Right
I hid behind my phone

You may hide behind your phone today
Or tomorrow, next week, or any other day
Like me you may want something you naturally don't get
Cover up reality just to siphon out the 'best'
But how long can it last till we meet with reality
What do we really gain before God and humanity
If we hide behind our phones??

A Taxi to Sakumono

This morning, I was late to leave home. To catch the company bus from 7am, I need to leave the house at 6:45am to catch a taxi.To do so if I want to walk the full stretch to the bus stop, I have to leave before 6:20am.

Today I left a little after 7am, so I prayed:
"Lord, please let me catch a Sakumono taxi as soon as I get to the junction"
Catching a Sakumono taxi instead of the other taxi means I don't need to cross two roads to get to the bus stop. It also saves me time at the same cost.

Guess what? As soon as I reached the junction, here was a Sakumono taxi signalling to me. Cool, huh? And guess what too? I was the last passenger to make it full. How delightful. I thanked God for answered prayer and sat in the taxi. Then I realised I had no earrings on. At that moment, I knew exactly why I felt like I had left something I couldn't remember when leaving my room. Great!!

Then it occured to me, right before I was about to yield to the temptation of complaining within me, God wanted me to get earrings, not catch the bus. You see, a Sakumono taxi gets me to the Sakumono station where I can get earrings there or at the next station I get to. God tried to hint me I had left something. When that failed, He stopped a taxi for me so I would keep in tune with Him and realise what I actually needed that morning. Not a cheaper ride to work, but a pair of earrings, a new one for that matter... lol!

How many times do we have a plan that God 'thwarts'? Yes, this story isn't a huge deal and I could have survived the day without earrings. However, it comes to show how God is really concerned about every little detail of our lives. How much more the big issues, the frustrating issues, the pressing issues? He is a God Who cares and orders our steps to our benefit without taking from His glory.

He is the God Who ensures I have all in the right place for the right time, His time, even my earrings.

Bless the Lord, O my soul!

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
(Jeremiah 29:11 - NIV)

Unconditional

My God
He loved
And loves me
Unconditionally

He teaches me
To love
And keep loving Him
Unconditionally

A baby born
God man
To redeem the World
To redeem me
With a love
Unconditional

Today, a tough place
An an unescapable place
I raise my hands
In praise
To love Him
Unconditionally

Today's sin before Him
Forgives me
Finds mercy
Blesses me beyond my expectations
With a love
Unconditional

Peer pressure abounds
Superior enticement surrounds
My heart resolute to serve Him
My body beaten by frustrations
My mind tormented by confusions
My will set to please Him
I will, I will obey Him
To love Him
Unconditionally

Gives me wisdom
Above my teachers
Gives me peace
Above the turmoil
Gives me strength
Above my capacity
With a love
Unconditional

Watch my work become rot
I'll be hopeful still
Watch my reputation smeared
I'll be truthful still
Watch my spirit broken
I'll be thankful still
Watch the doubtful waves rise higher
I'll be trusting still
To love Him
Unconditionally

My God!
My Love!

My God
He loved
And loves me
Unconditionally

He teaches me
To love
And keep loving Him
Unconditionally

I love you, Lord... so much...

Interesting, it's a wonder how much one can say with it.

One of my favourite words of ambiguity

How was the show?
Interesting
Very good

Did the food taste nice?
It was interesting
I wasn't sure if I was tasting soup or stew

How is she like?
Interesting
I like her a lot but she talks too much

How was the sermon?
Interesting
The preacher spoke well and his message spoke millions to me. He used a lot of jokes so I was rebuked as I laughed.

How was the match?
Interesting
The side I wasn't expecting to win won beautifully

How's your new place?
Interesting
I hate the place

Did you have fun on your date?
It was interesting
He was boring and irritating and he almost caused a vehicular accident

What do you think of this write up?

...

Interesting... loooooolllllll

Unsettled

This compassion I feel
This empathy
Driving me to do
What's deemed silly
Making me look stupid
And incompetent
Filling me with frustrations
Plaguing me like a disease
Heaping up my fatigue
My mind, it wanders

These hours unending
Those tasks still pending
The clock strikes five
And keeps going
I hiss at the time
But keep going
Unsure if I tread on
For passion or fear
For the sake of my salary
Or the values I hold dear
To impress my boss
Or please my God
To work for the work
Or to keep my job
To do a good job
Because it's not in me to do less
Shoddy work is not part of my make up
I can't cut corners to shape up
My mind, it wanders

Too tired to sleep
I have come to this point again
The nocturnal I am
Unable to be surpressed today
My eyes do not close because I have work to do
They just do not close from sheer exhaustion: 'tis true
Nocturnal me
Just go to bed
Do not rear your unusual head
Succumb to discipline and close your eyes
You know there's more to do after sunrise
You know you must arise before the crack of dawn
You know time will not be kind and deliver you from tomorrow's yawns
Sleep, nocturnal me
Just close your eyes and sleep
The world you live in belongs to the day not the night so sleep
Strange how exhaustion can make me more awake
And pushes me further away from what I need: sleep
My mind, it wanders

Settling not on one
Encouraging more frustration than fun
Resolving not the issues I face
Scattered info in it's wake
My mind still wanders

Iceberg

The sweat, the heat, my forgone treats
It showed nothing but effort

Day after day
Meagre results
Day after day

The ice beneath the waters beginning to form
The tip so small it looked forlorn
I talked about my efforts
But they could only but laugh
Make fun of it all in disbelief
Remind me how obvious my sacrifices brought none
None but no results
That was me

I worked harder each day
Believing the promise
That some day some day
I will be conspicuously rewarded
And I worked on

Sacrificing more
I pushed on

Then suddenly
Out of the blue
I reached my tipping point
The curve changed direction
The results had gained traction
People could see
Sometimes stop and question me
'Is that really you?
Oh my goodness you look so cool!'
It had begun
The hard work, all the efforts
It was visibly paying off

As the praise rose
Of my hard work now unopposed
I went back to work
Not wasting
But sacrificing more instead
Now I had hit recognition
There was a lot more to do
To mainitain
Maintain
My position

Now
Day after day
The sweat, the heat, my forgone treats
Revealed and maintained all, all, all my efforts